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5 Ways to Help a Friend Through a Breakup

Martin Novak

We have all been through this. The horrible break up. Whether a long term relationship or just a few months, any break up can shatter a person’s heart. But, friends can gather around and give a healing hand. Here are five great ways to help your friend through a break up. 

Some of the worst days of our lives will be spent trying to over come severe heart break from a failed relationship. It is not an easy thing to deal with. It can shake you to the core, lower your self esteem, and make you cry like you will never stop crying.

There is no better cure for heart break than time. It is a difficult reality to face. We all want the pain to disappear as soon as it starts, but it will not. They say that it takes half the time you were in the relationship to truly “get over” a person. This may be true, but it isn’t quite the silver lining people look for when their tears keep coming and their stomach feels like it is falling.

An important thing to remember is that friends and family can help you get through this tough time. Friends especially can guide you through the tears and see you on to the other side of this pain. As a friend to someone that is dealing with a break up, you need to step up and be there for them. These five tips for aiding them through their break up will help you make sure you do a great job getting them to feel a bit better until time can work its magic.

1. Laughter

Laughter is the medicine. This video seems a little strange at first, but it will work. You do n’t have to follow exactly what they say. Just the act of laughing will brighten your spirits and get you out of the slump of a hurting heart.

Watching funny movies, stand up specials on Netflix, or comedy TV shows will get the giggles coming and send those tears right out the door.

This is not a permanent fix, but it gets you started down the path of recovery.

 2. Staying Busy

Idle hands can be the devilish bad feelings playground. Keeping your hands and mind busy will push back the thoughts of the loss of the loved one. Your friend will surely appreciate the time spent with you and the carefree feelings that come with a day not focusing on the hurt.

There are lots of great activities around East Texas that are sure to keep you and your broken hearted friend moving and shaking through this tough time.

For the Outdoorsy Type

You might have read our article a while ago about the best outdoors activities in East Texas, but here are a few more.

Tyler State Park is always a great place to visit. You can mountain bike, canoe, kayak, hike, fish, swim (not in this weather, obviously), and so much more. Take in some fresh air on these beautiful acres.

Camp Tyler is not just for the kids. You can enjoy their activities, too. Don’t be scared of the goats, they will be your new best friends.

Though you might think this would be the best place to take someone going through the aftermath of a break up, the Tyler Rose Garden is. Have you ever played hide and go seek there? It is a lot of fun! Take a group of friends, including the one that is hurting, to the garden and play a large scale version of your old childhood favorite.

For the Indoors Type

When is the last time you and your friend had a spa day? With so many great spas, nail salons, and hair dressers in East Texas, you will have a hard time not finding the perfect place to relax.

If they love to read, take them to your local library. You can spend hours looking through the massive collection of books. Catch up on your favorite magazines. They also hold very interesting data of your town’s history. Let your local librarian help you read away the pain.

Go to an art museum or gallery. With the boom of arts and culture in our East Texas towns, there are more now than ever places to see some great art.

See a show at the Liberty Theater in Tyler, Texas. They have comedy, musicals, movies, and more. What a great way to get out on the town and forget about the ex.

Help Others

Find volunteer opportunities in your area. There is no better way, at times, to forget about your misery than helping someone else in need. You and your friend can feel better by doing good.

3. Eat the Emotions Away

Do not rely on food to be the comfort forever, but a good meal can help your friend. Going for a friend date at a good restaurant will give them quality time with you and allow you sometime to listen to them as they talk through their rough feelings.

There are endless options for any foodie around East Texas. You two probably already have a favorite spot.

P.S. Chocolate can always help a healing heart. Guy or gal, chocolate is the way to go. Their breakup might be tough right now because of the impending doom of Valentine’s Day, but that also means there is a surplus of available chocolate.

4. Drink Responsibly

Come on, we all know the truth. There are more songs written about drinking away pain than there are stars in the sky. We all need a little bit of booze to numb some hurt every once in a while.

Like food, this should not become a regular activity, but it can be a simple and temporary solution to the problem of a bleeding heart.

Grab a bottle from the store, visit your favorite bar, or enjoy a party. Put some alcohol in your friends system and see them feel a bit better.

There are rules though to this helpful hint to guiding your friend through heart ache.

1. Do NOT drink and drive. Call a cab or designate a DD.
2. Do NOT let them text or call their ex when they have drinking. This NEVER turns out well.
3. Do NOT let them drink too much. Alcohol is a depressant. The more they drink, the more depressed they can become. A mild feeling of being “tipsy” will keep them in good spirits, but too much can send them into a tear tornado. Plus, the morning after too many drinks will have them feeling worse than before the night out.
4. Don’t let the alcohol take you away from the point. Do NOT drink so much you cannot take care of them and they end up babysitting you. Do NOT drink too much and leave with a new flirt. Do NOT force shots down their throat or make them do something they don’t want to.

5. Open Ears and Kind Hearts

The most important thing your friend needs right now is a friend.

Listen to them. Don’t ever let them know that you are maybe getting a little tired of hearing about “old so and so ex” anymore. Let them talk and cry as much as they want.

Let them cry. They need it just as much as they need you right now.

Don’t bad mouth the ex. This is not helpful for anyone. Keep those “I told you so” feelings and the “I never really like them” conversations for a few years or months down the line. If they want to speak ill of the ex, that is their business. You have no right to talk bad about the boy or girl.

Leave your life out of it. Yes, you have been through a break up before and seen it all. They don’t need to hear that. They also don’t need to be dragged down further into the little upsets in your life right now. They need some time for everything to be about them.

Remind them that they are awesome. The biggest advice I ever give my friends, and myself, going through a heartache is:

You deserve more. You are awesome. It is their lose is someone chooses not to spend their time with you. But, you are now gaining the chance to meet someone that will want to spend that time. There is no time limit to find love. There is no “perfect” person that will make life better. You need to find love in yourself so that you can appreciate and love another so they can love you. Remember that if ANY situation, person, or place makes you hurt or feel uncomfortable, you need to leave it in the dust behind you.

 

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