Do You Co-Worker From Hell – 5 Ways To Deal With It
We deal with rude and annoying people all day long from the jerk who cuts off us when driving into work to the spoiled brat who is working at Starbucks and corrects the way you say "Latte." Most of us brush off these random acts of "mean-ness" but there is one person you can't get away from -- It's the "Office Bully" she is condescending and confrontational or worse she is nice to you face but then tells everyone else disparaging things about you. Quite simply she is impossible to get along with. Nothing short of a tragic auto accident involving her or you switching jobs is going to change things right? No -- there is hope -- read after the jump for ways to improve your workplace and find some peace.
1- Do Not Stoop To Her Level.
You must remain professional and neutralize her sharpness. You are the only part of this equation that you have control over. If you don't let her get under you skin then in fact you are walking away winning (no.. not Charlie Sheen type of "winning!!")
2- Don't give her any ammunition for shoot with.
Don't react to her harsh words or smart remarks. Kinda of like a fire if you cover it with a wet blanket it will go out sooner but if you keep adding wood to the fire it will continue to burn.
3- Offer some assistance.
Most people when they are people a bully are just trying to cover up a deeper hurt like money issues, poor self image or a bad marriage. True, this doesn't make their behavior any less hurtful but look at things from another angel takes the sting out of things. Normally when you reach out to someone their guard is let down and the hostility is toned down.
4- Involve a neutral third party.
This will almost be a type of mediation. If both of you can "own" your part in the situation this can be very helpful. You must be willing to see things the other person's prospective. Also both of you must leave the past in the past and move forward.
5- Move Forward.
The comes a point when you have to recognize that there is not going to be a resolution -- it is what it is -- and giving yourself ulcers about it isn't helping. Own your part of the situation and do not react to any negative actions or words. (Way easier for me to type this here than to actually do it)
We all want to be part of the "team" -- we seek approval. Know you are not contributing to the viscous cycle, hold your head up high and kill her with kindness.