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Lyle Lovett’s Rules of a Texas Gentleman

Eugene Gologursky, Getty Images

Lyle Lovett is a Texas favorite. For many years now, he has been almost the ideal country/cowboy gentleman. But, while we look up to and adore this man, have we really been following in his footsteps? Well, here is a chance for the Texas man to redeem himself. You can take his advice on how to be a better Texas gentleman. 

Esquire magazine recently released an article written by Mr. Lovett himself. This is a direct reaction and statement from Lyle Lovett on how exactly Texas gentlemen should act.

Pay attention boys, this is very important.

Here are the basic rules Lovett lays out:

1. Never discuss a woman’s weight.
This is a smart piece of advice. Women, no matter the size or shape, are in some way worried about their personal appearance and weight. Discussing a woman’s weight can leave you broken and bloodied in the wake of her scorn and fury. Protect yourself and leave the scale out of conversation.

2. Never guess a woman’s age.
This is again a way for men to protect themselves from the wild wrath of an angry woman’s scorn. Since men age so much better than us lady folk, we don’t want to talk about how much older we are getting. Let us take comfort in our anti-wrinkle creams and just tell us we are beautiful. Think about it, would you want us to bring up that beer belly you have been growing for a while now?

3. Shut up.
Lots of men already know this rule. But, Lovett says it best. There’s etiquette to listening: If they’re talking, shut up. Just shut up. Simple enough?” Sometimes we just want to talk about our day. We love when you help, but sometimes we don’t need you to fix the situation. We just need to talk about it. Plus, when you interrupt, we feel like you don’t care. Even if you don’t care, let us have that time to get it out.

4. Never venture into a woman’s purse.
Lovett says, “…invited or uninvited. Especially invited. Just refuse. Bring her her purse, don’t fish around in there. We don’t know what’s in there, and we don’t want to know.” The things that a woman carries in her purse are hers. You may not understand because your wallet and pockets are filled with just the essentials. We pack secrets and almost our whole lives in our purses. Leave some mystery there.

5. Never order for a lady.
I must agree with Lovett again on this one. Though you might think it romantic, ordering food for your lady at a restaurant is not. We want to make our own choice for what food we eat. Especially if you order us a salad, you are just breaking rule # 1. We take this as a hint towards how we need to diet which makes us think you believe us to be ugly. All of this emotion will lead you to no hand holding or anything beyond that.

These are just a handful of the great and honest tips Lovett gives in his Esquire article. To learn more and hear from the man himself, visit the Esquire website.

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