Someone buy John Calvery a dictionary because he needs to learn the definition of "emergency."

According to cfnews13.com, police in Port Orange, Florida arrested the 57-year-old man last Friday after he called 911 about 80 times in a five-hour period. Authorities said he dialed in once every three minutes.

It's unclear why Calvery repeatedly dialed the emergency number, but an affidavit reports him telling dispatchers, "I'll be on my porch with a gun, and I don't give a (expletive) if they are the cops."

Officials say Calvery thinks local police are out to get him for no good reason. He has since been released on $2,500 bond.

Calvery joins a growing list of folks who have abused the 911 system by failing to call for appropriate reasons. Here are six of the most ridiculous 911 calls:

[cfnews13.com]