In dumb criminal news, a 41 year old Rhode Island man who was found naked and covered in Crisco wound up getting arrested early Tuesday morning.

Rock Island Deputy Chief of Police Jeff VenHuizen said the man, Chad William Forber, told officers he had taken off his shorts because they were too big and would not stay on.

Haha! That's funny.

Chief Venhuizen added,

He said he had been dropped off... and that he had walked to the area where he was apprehended... He had lathered himself up in Crisco. He was covered in grease, and was holding the can under his arm. He said he was looking for a place to party.

And in a twist every one of us saw coming -- guess what police found when they searched his shorts? Drums please, methamphetamines.

And that kids is a shining example of why drugs are bad, m'kay.

Forber is being held on $40,000 bond.