Here’s How To Figure Out If You’re A Real Texan Or Not

I put out the call for "real Texans" to show off and I was not disappointed.

Being Texan is a unique experience. There are certain things that happen here that are dang near mandatory, and that's what we have on this list. Check it out:

You're not a real Texan if...you haven't seen ZZ Top live.

You're not a real Texan if...you haven't stepped on a goat-head.

You're not a real Texan if...you don't have sweet tea with dinner.

You're not a real Texan if...you don't clap after someone sings, "Well the stars at night, are big and bright..."

You're not a real Texan if...you haven't dodged a tumbleweed bigger than your car (Rod Parker).

You're not a real Texan if...you don't know someone named "Bubba".

You're not a real Texan if...don't call every soda "a coke".

You're not a real Texan if...you ain't suggested that hanging is an acceptable way to handle someone offering you a salsa made in New York City (Noel Ramirez)

You're not a real Texan if...you haven't caught horny toads (Josh Myers).

You're not a real Texan if...you don't eat your steak rare or medium.

You're not a real Texan if...you don't drive UNDER the speed limit in small towns.

On the "honorable mention list" were "Gone parking", "Been stuck in a bar ditch", "Eaten a popper" (C. Jakstas), "Picked black-eyed peas"(S.Ellis), "Used creative words like y'all'd've" (R. Raven), "If you say bacon grease in your eggs is gross" (G. Morgan", and "If you've never eaten an Allsup's burrito on a road trip".